Eddie Murphy’s ‘no advice’ rule and what it reveals
When Eddie Murphy’s son Eric welcomed a baby girl, Ari Skye, with Jasmin Lawrence, many assumed the veteran comedian and father of 10 would have endless tips to share. Instead, Murphy drew a firm line. Speaking at the American Film Institute Achievement Award ceremony, he said he refuses to give parenting advice because, in his words, “your kids don’t go by your advice… They watch and see what you do.” His stance captures a quiet humility: even with a large family and decades of experience, he recognises that what worked for him may not fit his children’s lives. It also highlights a generational shift. Older parents once felt obligated to hand down rules; Murphy’s approach leans toward leading by example and trusting grown children to figure things out. For everyday families, this is one of the most unexpected celebrity parenting lessons: sometimes the wisest move is stepping back.
Josh Allen and Hailee Steinfeld: new parents in the spotlight
While Murphy is easing into grandfatherhood, Josh Allen and Hailee Steinfeld are just beginning life as celebrity new parents. The couple welcomed a baby girl earlier this month, and Steinfeld has openly described the mix of joy and uncertainty. She told Architectural Digest she agonised over countless nursery details, wanting the space to be “bright and airy and comfortable” and somewhere you could spend hours without getting tired. In her Beau Society newsletter, she wrote about the “quiet conversations” she had with herself during pregnancy, asking, “What am I going to be like as a mom?” and daydreaming about the three of them cuddled up together. She called the experience “surreal” and admitted she doesn’t yet have words for the way her world is expanding. Their transparency offers a counterpoint to polished social media images, reminding new parents that even glamorous couples wrestle with doubts as they adjust to a family of three.
Why new parent advice overload feels so heavy
Between Eddie Murphy’s restraint and Hailee Steinfeld’s introspection lies a reality many new parents know too well: advice overload. Relatives offer “tried and true” methods, social media overflows with routines from influencers, and celebrity parenting lessons are packaged into viral clips and listicles. While much of this guidance is well-intentioned, the sheer volume can fuel anxiety and guilt. When every scroll delivers a new must-do—perfect sleep schedules, curated nurseries, “essential” products—parents may feel they’re failing if they don’t comply. Public figures, even when they share honestly, can unintentionally add pressure by normalising high-effort lifestyles most families can’t or don’t want to replicate. Murphy’s comment that kids follow example more than words hints at a quieter truth: watching, experimenting, and staying present with your child often matter more than following any script. Recognising advice culture as optional—not mandatory—can be the first step toward relief for overwhelmed new parents.
A framework for filtering parenting advice without losing your mind
With so much new parent advice overload, families need a way to filter parenting advice rather than absorb everything. One approach is to start with values: ask, “Does this tip fit the kind of family we want to be?” Next, consider evidence—does the suggestion come from credible health guidance or just a viral trend? Finally, factor in your child’s temperament and your own limits. A method that suits a celebrity’s schedule may be unrealistic in an ordinary household. Eddie Murphy’s belief that his kids learn more from what he does than what he says suggests that consistency and authenticity beat perfection. Instead of copying celebrity or influencer routines, treat them as case studies, not commandments. If a strategy aligns with your values, has some grounding in research, and feels workable with your baby’s unique needs, keep it. If it breeds dread or shame, it’s likely not for your family.
Setting gentle boundaries while staying open to support
Both Murphy’s reluctance to lecture and Steinfeld’s candid reflections point toward a key reality: there is no one-size-fits-all parenting. Even experienced parents recognise that their playbook may not fit the next generation. For new parents, that means learning to welcome support without surrendering control. Setting boundaries can sound like, “Thanks for sharing what worked for you—we’ll try what fits our baby,” or, “We’re working with our pediatrician on this, but we appreciate your concern.” You can designate a few trusted voices—a healthcare professional, a close friend, perhaps a mentor parent—and let everyone else be background noise. When advice stings, remember that most people are trying to help, even if clumsily. The goal is not to block out all input, but to curate it. By blending humility, like Murphy’s, with reflection, like Steinfeld’s, everyday families can craft their own path through early parenthood with confidence and grace.